Unlike the Hectic Clan, with our 8 kids and nearly 300 people relatives on my wife’s side just two generations removed…as I was growing up, my was pretty small. I have one sister and a small handful of cousins. As such, we used to all gather for the big holidays to celebrate together. So unlike Hectic Mom, I know my cousins really well.
Unfortunately, I was born in a lull amongst those cousins. While there was a mess of them right around my sisters age and a large group clumped older than me, I was in a window with nobody else within 5 years of my age. The only good part about that was that I moved up to the adult table a lot earlier than my sister. Shhhh…don’t say anything, it still bugs her!
Thanksgiving and Christmas meals are the reason I’m also an ambidextrous eater. I have several left-handed cousins, and my Mom and Aunt used to seat me next to them, always at the left end of the line. Rather than bump elbows with my much larger and stronger cousins, I simply learned to eat left-handed. To this day I never know which hand I’ll use to pick up my fork…and it doesn’t matter, since I’m equally dextrous with either one. Of course, that doesn’t help when you’re trying to lose weight and people say “eat with your non-dominant hand”. That just doesn’t work for me!
Because we had a fairly large group that got together, and everybody was pretty boisterous, I have a ton of memories from those gatherings. Everybody in my family are story tellers, and with each passing year the tales grew more grand. Some would say we exaggerated them, but I prefer to say we embellished them to add to their enjoyment. I know that those days were filled with lots of laughter.
It’s not just my memory that I have to rely on. We used one of the first cassette tape recorders to record several of the gatherings. Later in the day, my Dad played the tape back to everyone’s wonder and surprise. The funniest part was when one of my cousins complained about the repetitive loud clinking that obscured much of the dialogue. We did a little detective work and determined that another of my cousins spent the entirety of his meal cutting something. With more sleuthing we determined he’d spent all that time cutting his chunky applesauce (a new development, having replaced smooth applesauce) because he “…didn’t like the big old hunks of apple in his applesauce…” and didn’t want to complain to the hostess.
Yeah, kind of a weird bunch, my family.
But if any of you are reading this…I miss those days! We had some good times.
Some of my fondest memories center around my grandmother, Nonnie (I’ve written about her before on my other blog). I’m pretty sure everybody would agree she was the reason we were so feisty and ornery. She was full of spunk, and even though her body was trying to fail her for the last decade-plus of her life…her mind was like a steel trap. Well, it was usually like a steel trap. The one exception was when she was drinking Mogen David wine. If you can imagine Welch’s grape juice that’s fermented for the past few months and then made a bit sour with apple-cider vinegar…you’ve got the smell and taste down.
Nonnie didn’t drink much, despite having owned and managed a liquor store for much of her adult life, but when she was at a holiday meal, somebody always made sure we were stocked with Mogen David. I was always baffled by why my Polish Catholic grandmother drank a kosher wine for Christmas. But it was one of those examples of what my high school chemistry teacher used to say:
A mystery to be lived, not a puzzle to be solved.
Wise words!
Of course, I couldn’t live the mystery…I had to know. Recently I ran across the wikipedia article for Mogen David and discovered this quote:
Max Cohen, company President and founder, noted that 98 percent of Mogen David’s customers were not Jewish.
So that pretty much explains it!
I’ll never forget Nonnie’s cheeks getting redder and her voice getting louder as she downed small glass after small glass of her wine. Nobody else drank it, so it was her wine. But we all enjoyed her loosened tongue. Many of the stories I remember from these gatherings were hers. Of course, they definitely fell into the embellished category throughout the years. But so what? Sometimes the facts of the stories we tell (or remember) aren’t nearly as important as the feelings they engender.
And honestly, I have great memories of those Christmas and Thanksgiving family gatherings. Much of it thanks to a kosher wine…Concord Mogen David!
As this holiday seasons rolls around, I’ve been thinking about those who are no longer with us. A lot. And Nonnie is one of those people that I miss the most. She was an awesome lady, and while I never heard these words out of her mouth, I can absolutely imagine her in (bad) harmony with the Gatlin Brothers at the Pearly Gates asking this pertinent question:
Will they have Mogen David in Heaven?
Dear Lord, we’d all like to know.
Will they have Mogen David in Heaven, sweet Jesus?
If they don’t, who the Hell wants to go?
So whether you’re sitting down to a meal with a menorah or a Christmas tree in the background, have yourself a blessed holiday season. Take a minute to remember those who are no longer with us and say a prayer for them. And then get back to the shenanigans with the family and friends who are still with you!